Of Beasts and Vengeance (Twisted Pages Book 2) by Elle Madison & Robin D. Mahle

Author:Elle Madison & Robin D. Mahle [Madison, Elle]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Whiskey and Willow Publishing
Published: 2021-01-21T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter Thirty-Three

Zaina

I realize that no matter what I’ve been telling myself, some small, irrational part of me has been holding on to hope that Einar might forgive me, might see through the mask I’ve donned and the distance I’ve forced between us.

I replay his expression when he backed away from me, the way it had bordered on disgust before hardening into nothingness, and I cringe.

My fingertips brush against my lips, still swollen from our kisses, and my eyes begin to burn.

But then again, who am I, really, apart from the woman he felt obligated to marry for the sake of his people, the woman who betrayed him and nearly cost him the few loved ones he has left.

I find myself wondering if he ever shared my feelings for him at all, or if I was so unused to kindness that I mistook the slightest bit of compassion for something more.

I clung to every morsel of his humanity, allowing it to steady me like the anchor to a ship in a treacherous sea.

I was a foolish woman desperate for the attention of an even more foolish man.

And it hardly matters in the end, because Einar and I are entirely too similar, we’re like trying to force together the same sides of a magnet. We might get close, but we can never quite seem to meet in the middle.

Khijhana’s padding footsteps are the only sound that accompanies me as I make my way back to the passageway. He doesn’t call out. Doesn’t come after me.

And that, more than anything, convinces me that whatever semblance of a spark Einar and I had before is gone now.

I should be glad for that. It’s what I wanted, or what I told myself I needed. It’s what I have been working for.

It should be easier this way...right?

And maybe it will be, eventually...but here in this moment I am too tired of the pretense and the energy it takes to feign hating him. Not when I am alone like this.

My sodden slippers slap against the floor of the passageway, somehow leading me forward when I still haven’t decided which direction I’m headed.

The places I can go in the castle are limited, and I can’t face going back to his room just yet. Instead, I eventually find myself coming to a halt outside what was once my bedchamber.

The broken door swings open with minimal effort, shards of wood splintering off near my feet, and it just barely latches behind me. I take a stilted breath as I look over the damage I caused to the once beautiful room. The curtains and sheets are shredded. So much of the wood is covered in claw marks. Suddenly I am transported back to that fateful night and I can hear Khijhana’s keening as clearly as the moment I abandoned her.

My chest tightens as my chalyx nuzzles against my legs, her purrs growing loud enough to pull me from the memory.

I don’t deserve her comfort. I don’t deserve her loyalty. But I

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